Wednesday, September 27, 2006
ok... i admit i've been thinkin too much... too much till my spaces in my hard drive in me have been used up.. FERLYNN... everytime i look at his profile... i feel so down...he doesnt like to talk bout the past.... "A picture paints a thousand words" but he still put up her picture in his frenster... doesnt tt realli remind him of her?? to me... if i'm not his gf... and i'm juz a passer by viewin ppl's a/c... i would think tt this guy is showin off to ppl tat he got many gfs... i wish he would put himself in my shoes... if i put my pic wif guys... how would he feel?? i cant talk to guys nor go out wit them... but he can!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! i'm mad for the fact tt he still can put his ex pictures on frenster... i dun mind yuying pics... but i'm totally mad wif him puttin ferl pics... he tell me he dun like her... but her pic still exist... wtf!!! arGH!! too mad to continue laa..
8:40 PM;
I made my mark
Sunday, September 24, 2006
bOo!! here i am blogging again!! hahaha... first and foremost... i'm realli glad to haf kenny as my kor kor! kor kor kenny! kenny kor kor!!! hahahaha!! bleAh... my listening ear... soon he'll be my punching bag... hahaha... ya.. he's my jukebox kor kor.. hahhaa.. btw.. yesterday went out wif him, my sis and her bf... went to eat and CPK.. den watch movie.. he's botak! whakakaka.. round round... miss him alrdy... tdy fasting mth commences.. every muslims out there (i hope) is fulfilling God's will for us to fast as of today till the time comes.. sianx... skoOl startin tmr... i'm so afraid to step beyond today... i'm so scared i cannot cope.. i'm so stressed over skool werk and cca... "tomorrow's a bettter day..." i keep telling myself... but the sentence deceived me day aft day... wen else can i sit and rest??? not thinkin bout anythin and stress?? cryin will not do.... cuz others dun like it wen i'm blue... talkin to myself n ppl'd think i'm nut...hAppy... got meet him ystd.. tonight we meetin too.. pass him my hp.. if not he gong gong nvr bring hp den cannot msg me... stoOpid toad... haha.. oh ya... juz now wen i was online still... i saw my ex.. i said hi... he din reply... dis is not the first... i dunno y he refuses to tok to me... worst of all... wen i said hi... he immediately change his status to busy.... haiyo... wads wif him oso i dunno... juz say hi oni wad... not ask if i'm askin for his life or money... i need to buy lotsa note books!! i gonna study real hard for my this sem modules!!! and not slack!! and a note book for my cca... haix... wen i think of cca.. i sianx liao... hahaha... k la... wanna go watch tv aredy.... blog another time!!
5:40 PM;
I made my mark
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
i had a new haircut today!! or shud i say ystd.. lol... i wen wif shihui... we had new looks... she cut and dyed her hair while i juz had a hair cut... so yucky!! so shrt!!! ystd slack whole day... off day... missing him again... tallked to efa... she misses he bf too!! lol... oh ya... i registered for my gems aredi... at first i click drama appreciation for wed 1-3... den they say unsuccessful.. i was abt to gif up den i saw another drama appreciation.. i click it.. i got it!!! so lucky!! shihui got into same gem as me... lol..... drama queens... so fun... hidayah got into Knowing Your Rights... gwen got into design appreciation... she was so scared wen i couldnt log on to her account in sas... aft we put down fone.. i retry again den can.. lol... today werkin 1 till close... sianz laa.... wed sia... boring day... omg... gonna rot another 10 hours... i miss my skool mates... but i dowan go skool.... i very stress... ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i dowan the chairperson post in expedition committee.... ii got too much thing to worry bout.... studies... den werk.... den cca... bf.... family... i still need time to do assignments.... how??? i feel so farked up.... sometimes i wish i din join spac2go... i wish i have no cca... last sem i could bearly cope wif studies and werk... now cca and bf.. how am i suppose to commit myself to all this?? haiyo...
3:25 AM;
I made my mark
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
its been daays since i posted anythin... too much things tt i want to let out.. but i dunno which one to begin with... i feel so pressurized!!! i'm like at the bottom part of my life... no rope could pull me up... onli his hand that can reach out for mine could help me ease my pressure... at SPAC2GO camp... i did enjoy myself.... last day of camp... seniors ask us to vote for chairperson, v.chairperson, treasurer and secretary for expedition and residential committee.... least i expected tt i would b chosen to b e chairperson for expedition committee... my v. chair is feng kai and secretary kamae and treasurer daryl.. i dunno wad to do... i'm so lost! to chair a committee needs a lot of committment... i dunno if i possess one.. my life is filled with werk, skool, den now..cca.. frenz and family... not forgeting my dear of cuz... everthin is compressed together... tats wad my life is... skool... aft skool..werk.. since now i in charge of expedition committee... i have to let go of my werk abit... i feel so guilty.. i cant bear to werk so little.. not fer income.. but fer the sake of fulfilling the short of manpower on certain days... den... las min... sum1 told me to held a meetin tis week... i'm already so packed... now i have to take leave on thurs and find replacement asap... which i cant find at all! how?? i'm so stressed up.. den he told me to plan wad to do.... wad to bring.... i dun even noe wad i'm supposed to do... am i suppose to plan for a camp... or plan to find external helpers.. or wad? i'm so lost! fArk laa... den recently i juz saw my 2nd sem time table... freakin tight sia!!! i dunno what do dey have against dcp1b04... where have we gone wrong?? i practically end my lessons at 5pm!!! i still have to go werk... aRgH!!! i dunno wad to do... self-multilating crosses my mind every second.... but i muz rmb tt i'm meeting him in 4 days time...i freakin lOst!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! someone... show me some guidance.... i dunno wad to do wit myself...the pain iinside is evoking...i wanna scream if i can.... where is he?? i miss him alot!!!! omg.... help me.....
2:59 AM;
I made my mark
Friday, September 08, 2006
today... he left for camp... i feel bad not waiting for his call tat nite.. he called me a few times and i was aslp.. luckily around 6 plus... i picked up d fone and tok to him fer awhile.... now... i'm so lonely... i feel lost.. i cant hog on d fone wit him every nite.. i miss him.. miss his voice.. miss his nonsense... haiz.... today werked at 8 till close... i feel so bored... nth to do.. haiz... till here for now..
11:29 PM;
I made my mark
my blog... i hope i wun leave it dangling again like my previous blog... tats b cuz i forgot my user and pw!!! not my fault! haha... hmmm... yes! my life has changed...today marks a special day in my life... 7th sept 06.. i'm now attached to a wonderful guy... he hu must not be named is a special person whom i wish to go thru my life with.. sharing sorrows, burdens and joy together... haiz... sad... tmr he goin ns... i saw him turn and left and tats e last time i saw him... i cried.. sad.. 2 yrs... hope we'll still have feelings fer each other aft he finish his service... till den.. chaoz..
2:44 PM;
I made my mark
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