Monday, February 04, 2008
i wonder y i had to change for the one i hAD once loved.. tHAts foolishness.... but human are realli blinded by love... they go all out to cater to the other's needs.. made promises which you wouldnt keep.. said u love me but din mean it.. i restrained from alcohol... avoid clubbing... stOp meetin guy friends... all b cuz i love u... HAh! eeww... fArkin muShy! EEW eew eEW.. thinkin back.... why do i make promises and keep it but to realize ur not keepin urs? i'm so lOnely nOw... despite knowing that i have long list of friends in my contact... i still can't press any call key on any contact... my life is different from all of them.. 3/4 of em r skooling... 1/4 of them i hardly noe.. out of 3/4... 9/10 r attached.. even my bestfren has been ignoring me for 2 mths.. she's all diff aft she's attached.. cant blame her.. its normal... i guess i skipped my youth.. and realize the drastic change and finds it hard to accept.. each sunday i spend my day coopin up in my room doin nth but surfing net and slp and wake up and surf net and slp.. even my mum is getting worried... if days i end werk early.. i'll be home by 6 plus.. and coop in the room... she kept askin me... "not going out?" or "so.... going where today?" den i'll give her a weird look and say.." i'm not going anywher... i'm stayin hm.." u noe.... tat feeling.... 'empty'... i feel so empty.. i dunno wwad to do wit my life.. i haf frens hu said "u haf me...." words dissipate wen there's no meaning to it.. i mean.. i appreciate it.. but it doesnt haf any meaning to me.. the onli person hu would come running to my hse wen i hid under my blanket and cried was the old mabel... that i'll keep rmbring for life... it created a big impact on me.. hw many of my frenz would do tt? i could count it with ONE finger previously... now... tt finger had rot.... and dropped off.. cut? no need to say.. just do it... i wish one day................... nvm..
1:41 AM;
I made my mark
Friday, February 01, 2008
fark! fARK FAAARRRRK!!!!!!!!!!!FARK!!!!!!!!!!!!FARK eUU!!!!!!!!!!! aAaaRGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! k... i'm good...
9:12 PM;
I made my mark
